Divide

You divide yourself you leave you too thin. Guess I know that. Guess here’s my home. Spoke to coworker for 2 hours. It’s not fair, I’m so sorry, Drunk. But not cutting. Drunk. But not caring. Sorry. I don’t have anything to say, Anymore.

Suicide TW

Things aren’t good. I’m currently doing my Gyms charity “Tread Together” challenge for Suicide Awareness. That’s good… but Tuesday night I tried to kill myself. Granted I was drunk and it was a piss poor attempt. I’m pretty sure I would have survived without intervention unless I woke up and kept going which actually might… Continue reading Suicide TW

Tomorrow

If it comes Psychiatrist. I was discharged like 6 or 7 weeks ago from inpatient. NO! Not just fucking inpatient… FUCKING SEND ME INVOLUNTARILY ON A PLANE TO “SPECIALIST INTENSIVE TREATMENT”. SPEND THE 9 DAYS BEFORE CONTAINING ME. SHOVING ME ASIDE. WHO ARE YOU AGAIN? OH SORRY YOURE MY PSYCHIATRIST, THOUGHT YOU WERE JUST SOME… Continue reading Tomorrow

Pain

I want nothing more than to bleed out. Run one of my blades across every vein I can see, forearms and neck. See red. See black. See nothing. Do nothing. Sink into the abyss. Done. But I can’t. The depression is bad. Self harms bad. Alcohols bad. Anorexia B/P is bad. Works bad. My soul… Continue reading Pain

“Hey baby, can you bleed like me?”

Chest cut is healing. No longer gaping, closed and thin. A small victory, but a victory none the less. Morbid she said. Can’t argue. I don’t care about cuts or scars anymore – it’s the status quo. But this one haunts me. Morbid she said. Yes lovely, it is, and I hate it. Tinder. Uh… Continue reading “Hey baby, can you bleed like me?”